Things Men Need to Know About Women

Never trust a girl who has no friends. She doesn’t get along with other women because she’s either bat-shit crazy or just plain mean.

Girls who say, “I love sports!” are lying. Girls who ask you what time the game is on, without specifying which game they’re talking about, are not.

If you get a girls number on a Friday, Tuesday and Wednesday are your best bets to score a date. Monday is too desperate, Thursday is too late.

Never trust the woman who gives you the best blow job you’ve ever had.

Women who are obsessed with their dogs also like to keep their men on a short leash.

Over the course of her life, a women will use 10 men for every one she loves. If you lent her your car or helped her move and didn’t get laid, you’re one of the 10.

The average woman owns eight bras and wears each one five times before washing.

On a first date, women never order what they really want to eat.

At least one of her friends wants to sleep with you.

She likes one of your friends.

Rub a sheet of medium-grade sandpaper across your face. That’s your five o’clock shadow when you kiss her. Now rub that sandpaper on your inner thigh. J

The one breakup line she’ll never be able to argue you out of: “I’m sorry, but I no longer have feelings for you.”

You’ll probably never know how many guys she’s slept with. The standard lie is five. Which really means about twelve.

[taken from Maxium]