Overheard on the streets of New York:

Guy #1: No, man, she's been lying for a while now.
Guy #2: I dunno, man...
Guy #1: It's true. Remember that time I was like, "Hey, where's your baby?" And she was like, "Oh yeah...I had a miscarriage."
Guy #2: True. True.
-Pick a Bagel, 3rd Ave between 22nd & 23rd

Young woman on cell: He said he just wasn't attracted to me. What do you think he meant by that?
-60th & Madison

Drunk girl: Kool-Aid is my most favorite drink in the whole world. When she moved in, it was like great, because it was like, "You love Kool-Aid, too? Awesome, we're going to get along great." But then it ended up, she tried to kill me with a steak knife.
-11th St & 2nd Ave

Girl #1: Everyone always criticizes my choice in men. I get so sick of it; there's nothing wrong with Tom.
Girl #2: He looks like Hitler, he drools, he's always whining and making high-pitched noises, and everyone keeps putting him down, and he never even stands up for himself.
Girl #1: He may be a total loser and a freak but he still has some redeeming qualities. Plus if I didn't date him no one else would.
Tom: Thanks.
-Grand Central

College kid #1: God, that girl over there's hot!
College kid #2: Dude, you need to stop being so obsessed with chicks with tattoos. I fucked a girl with a tattoo, and it was pretty unpleasant.
College kid #1: That's because she was 48 years old and a grandmother...[To entire train] Did everyone hear that? A grandmother!
-L train

Male student #1: Your sister has the best tasting punani in New York.
Male student #2: I'll pay for lunch if you promise not to say that again.
-Columbia University

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