Friday, September 08, 2006

Overheard on the streets of New York:

Airport security guard #1: Hey, I gotta get me a mongoose.
Airport security guard #2: Yeah, man. Gotta keep them cobras off them planes.
-JFK

Suit: And now she wants to be involved in my strategic planning initiative? Fuck her!
-Rockefeller Plaza

Sassy flight attendant: In the event of a loss of cabin pressure, oxygen masks will be released from the overhead above your seat. After the screaming subsides, please place the oxygen mask around your nose and mouth. If you are traveling with a child or an adult who is acting like a child, place your mask on first before attempting to help put theirs on.
-Flight out of LaGuardia

Girl: I'm done with threesomes. Someone always gets hurt. It's four-gies only from now on.
-Duane Reade, 32nd & Broadway

Girl on cell: I don't care how many fingers you put in her. Bottom line is, she didn't blow you. So I win.
-Times Square

Ghetto girl #1: So I was all, "As if," and she was all, "Whatever!"
Ghetto girl #2: Yo, dat's some fucked up shit.
Ghetto girl #1: So when I got home, I totally unfriended her on MySpace.
Ghetto girl #2: I'ma hafta smack dat bitch up, fo' realz!
Ghetto girl #1: Oh, just unfriend her! She'd hate that even more!
-S train

Young man: I don't care what you say. I just wanna get a big stroller and have my wife push me around. I don't care what you say. That's pimp. That's pimp.
-23rd & Broadway

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