Overheard on the streets of New York:

Girl on cell: Mom, are you drunk at Wal-Mart again?
-86th & Lex

Ghetto girl: Man, I can't believe he did this! I mean, we was in this relationship for like two weeks, and now he be tryin' to dump me! He was all, "Yeah, we're over." I was like, "What you talkin' about?" Then he was all, "I'm taking you off my Top 8."
Passerby: He took you off his My Space Top 8? Oh, hell, no.
-Baryshnikov Arts Center

Chick: You can tell this is the comics section 'cause all the fat, ugly people are here.
Dude: You're gonna get lynched.
-Barnes & Noble

Hipster #1: And the funny thing was... she had no curtains, right?
Hipster #2: Yeah?
Hipster #1: Yeah, and I mean I wasn't entirely comfortable with that, but what was I supposed to say, "I'm not comfortable with my penis in your mouth right now"?
Hipster #2: Obviously you weren't gonna say that!
-Duane Reade, 23rd between 6th & 7th

Girl: Look at that guy. He's such a loser. He's wearing a fanny pack and he's covering his ears. We're at a concert. What is his deal?
Guy: The only thing that could be worse is if he had a Trapper Keeper.
-Roseland Ballroom, 52nd & Broadway

Drunk guy: I have to move down to this end of the train because, if I don't, I'm gonna hit that motherfucker down there. I know I only want to hit him because I've been drinking. If I wasn't drinking, he wouldn't bother me. If I had been drinking more, I'd just hit him. But right now I'm caught in a strange netherworld and I'll just chill down here.
-1 train

50-Something guy on cell: Yeah, I just spoke to Kate, and everything is wonderful. The liquor stores are open, and people are riding bicycles.
-1st Ave between 9th & 10th

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