Friday, November 25, 2005

McDonald's response to the Subway Diet

People like to photo-copy their ass... a lot

Photocopier supplier Canon is warning customers to take better care of their office equipment during the Christmas period, claiming that the festive season traditionally leads to a 25 percent hike in service calls due to incidents such as the classic ‘copying your ass’ prank.

Such a stunt, a mainstay of the office party, often results in cracked glass on the copier, with 32 percent of Canon technicians claiming to have been called out to fix glass plates during the Christmas period after attempts to copy body parts went wrong.

In fact, Canon claims a shocking 46 percent of service calls are in response to non-work-related breakages.

One case he'd attended, where a young lady had cracked the glass mid-scan, also jammed the scanner so that it wasn't until the machine was fixed and her colleagues all sober that copies of her backside starting pouring from the machine.

Partly in response to this trend--or perhaps because of the "supersizing" of the western physique--Canon has now increased the thickness of its glass by an extra millimeter.

How funny is this? I mean, this is such a common problem/occurrence in the industry… Canon has to make engineering changes to the thickness of the glass! Awesome, just awesome. Looks like most companies need to install the Ass Copier… click to read more, or click to read the article.

The diagonal lines are parallel... whoa, weird?

Jeez leweez, good gosh- Pamela Anderson

Everyone knows they are fake and obnoxiously large… but I didn’t realize they were this big. She’s practically falling over with these things.

Shooting locks off doors like in the movies

This post is just one of those things you read and think, “Hmm, that information was really useless but it’s good to know.” So on that note, here goes:

You know how in the movies when someone can’t get through a door they always step back and tell the person with them to 'watch out' so they can shoot the lock off. And sure enough, in one try they shoot the lock and it blows apart. Well some guy decided to see if that could really happen… here are the results:

1. "How hard is it to shoot off a lock?" Answer: Very hard.

2. Pistols won't shoot a lock off or even penetrate the lock.

3. The rifles went through the locks with ease. It is obvious that you could "knaw" off the lock, little by little with a rifle, but a shotgun does it with one shot.

4. The "best" way to break a lock is to shoot down onto the top of the lock body, or shoot the hasp itself.

Click here to see the full dissected test complete with pictures.

Locking up your children is safe and effective?

So I’d like to think I’m not as gullible as the average person- but after visiting I realized how easy I fall for stuff sometimes. This site is dedicated to offering baby cages to lock up your children (which of course I thought was completely wrong). However, what took me a while to realize is that this was a joke... and their are several jokes scattered throughout the website. For example, on the main page- above a picture of a baby cage the there reads a quote, “Thank you so much for your business. Support our Troops.” Check out the site to see exactly what I’m talking about. The mere fact someone has created this site is kind of twisted and wrong… but most will admit it gives you a chuckle to view the content on this site. Click here to go to

Jewellery robbery doesn't quite go as planned

Check out this video of a jewellery robbery. It takes place somewhere in Europe (that’s the best I can narrow it down to because of the accents the people have). What’s different about this video is that you see the entire robbery take place with live video and audio. Usually security cameras use that time-lapsed photography, but it looks like this jewelry store didn’t go cheap with their security setup. Kind of scary, kind of funny, kind of sad… all in one video. One thing is for sure, this burglar didn’t exactly think this through. Click here to watch the video.

(click image to watch robbery)

Flavored water in a soda can and bottle?

Check out this flavored water that looks like both a soda can and a water bottle. Semi-sorta-cool and trippy to look at. The only downside…all they have is apple or peach flavor though- ewww! Click to buy ($24 per case of 24 cans).

The 'Hollywood' sign listed on ebay?

Taken directly from the ebay listing:

“Yes, it's true. The HOLLYWOOD sign is for sale. I'm selling the original HOLLYWOOD sign, which was built in 1923… Why am I selling the sign? I am a producer/entrepreneur, and I am simply too busy with my other projects to work on the sign. It has been an amazing experience.”

WTF? I had no idea a citizen actually owned this thing… I mean I just figured the city had control and rights to such iconic monument. 1.) I wonder if anyone will buy it for 300k? 2.)I wonder what that person will do with it? Click here to see the actual eBay listing.


[via J-Walk]

Man tugs rental truck with his penis? WTF?

Yes, you read that right. He pulled a truck with his penis.

Grandmaster Tu Jin-Sheng, best known for his Iron Crotch (I’m not making this up, honestly), attached himself not once, but twice, to a rental moving truck and pulled it several yards across a parking lot. In lace-up leather boots and a black tank top, the 50-year-old tied a strip of blue fabric around the base of his penis and testicles and tugged to make sure it was on tight. An assistant kicked him hard between the legs before he lashed himself to the vehicle.

He groaned, grunted and pressed against two men for resistance. Then, slowly, the truck began to roll forward. Click here to read the full article about this weird ass dude. His next plans? He wants to tug a Boeing 747 with 12 other dudes penises. WTF?

A liquid condom? What the heck?

China has approved and now is selling liquid condoms.

This condom (unlike its predecessor) is designed for female rather than male usage. The condom-in-a-can is essentially an foam spray that the manufacturer claims forms a physical membrane inside the vagina, protecting it from infection, acting as a barrier to pregnancy and providing a lubricating effect.

This is also more than ‘functional’ than a traditional condom. It can effectively kill gynaecological disease pathogens such as staphylococcus aureus, Candida, coliform bacillus, and can prevent sexually transmitted diseases.

“It can remain in the vagina for a long time without destroying the vagina's chemical balance," the company adds. "Daily use of this product can help maintain genital hygiene and prevent infection by pathogens". Click here to read the full article.

Waited 55 hours just to smash the Xbox 360?

(click image to read why this happened)

The little shovel that could

Check out this clever little product that is conveniently “just-in-time” for the winter season. It is called The Wovel. This thing works on the principle of leverage- the key element being the wheel that is mounted to it. It allows you to take the ‘pain’ out of shoveling and carrying snow. The only downside to this clever little gadget… it’s a $120. Kind of expensive if you ask me. In my case I would only use this product a handful of times (living in the Midwest). However, I guess if you lived up north dropping $120 to make shoveling snow might be worth the investment. Click here to find out more about this product.

(click image to find out more)