Tuesday, March 25, 2008

Caption this.

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Dude kills his toddler over broken X-Box

A man who killed his 17 month-old daughter in a rage over a broken Xbox has been sentenced to more than 20 years in prison.

Philadelphia prosecutors say 27 year-old Tyrone Spellman killed Alayiah Turman with at least five blows to the head when she pulled down his Xbox console. The force of the blows cracked the toddler's skull.

Spellman was convicted in January of third-degree murder and child endangerment. » Article here

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OMG this is so real...

Man runs 40 yard-dash in women's clothing & high-heels to win Hannah Montana tickets. Kind of a shock b/c he is on workers' comp for being hurt

Prosecutors say a video shows a Connecticut correction officer running a 40-yard-dash in women's clothing and high heels - at a time he had claimed he was too injured to work.

Garrett A. Dalton of Naugatuck has been charged with workers compensation fraud. He's accused of taking part in a radio station's contest for Hannah Montana concert tickets last year. Not only did he have to dress in drag but he had to carry an egg on a spoon.

Authorities were alerted after someone saw Dalton in a TV news report. Prosecutors say the 41-year-old collected more than $5,000 in workers' compensation after he reported a work-related injury in June. » Article here

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Shadows of faces made using paper.

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Woman pulls gun on deliverymen for not taking shoes off

Two furniture deliverymen fled a home after a customer produced a gun because they wouldn't take their shoes off.

Two employees of Howell's Furniture Gallery were making a delivery to a house. The homeowner, who was not identified, asked the deliverymen to take off their shoes. They replied removing their shoes was against company policy and pointed out they were wearing protective covers so as not to damage her carpet, the report stated.

An argument ensued, which expanded to cover other problems the woman had with the store, and the woman got a handgun. The delivery men told police she never pointed the gun at them, but they left anyway and called police.

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WTF, WTF, WTF, WTF, WTF, WTF???

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Woman drives car with no pants high

A drunken driver had a suspended license and had marijuana in her car. Oh, they also say she didn't have any pants on.

Yonkers police say 22-year-old Angelica Buchanan was found Saturday standing bottomless in a street near her car. They say she was so drunk she had to be hospitalized.

Police say she claimed she wasn't wearing pants because she needed to use the bathroom. They've charged her with driving while intoxicated, unlicensed operation of a vehicle and marijuana possession. » Article here

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Take it easy there John Paul...

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Falling asleep on the job can improve memory

Falling asleep on the job for a few minutes can improve your memory and mental performance, according to a team of German researchers. Dr. Olaf Lahl at the University of Dusseldorf, Germany, has shown that simply falling asleep does more than refresh the brain - it can improve recall and mental efficiency.

In fact, a six-minute nap can have the same effect as nighttime sleep on memory. Dr. Lahl's team asked students to memorize a list of vocabulary and tested their ability to recall the list after an hour of playing solitaire. The researchers found that those who had been allowed to nap displayed "superior recall" in the memory test compared to those who stayed awake. » Full article here

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Poor kid.

Dude beats wife because house was not cleaned properly

A man is accused of beating his wife because she didn't clean the house properly.

Marion County deputies arrested Robert Lambert on Friday. When they arrived at the couple's home in northeast Marion County they said the woman had been severely beaten. The victim said her husband has also threatened to kill her in the past. Lambert was charged with felony battery. » Article here

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This Tom Cruise impression is the best I've ever seen.

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Feed the Jedi.

'As a working mom, its hard to find time to masturbate.'

As a single mother of three with a full-time career, I've got a lot on my plate. Between making the children's breakfast in the morning and making sure they brush their teeth at night, I hardly have any time to take care of myself. Sometimes, I just get so darn busy that I'll realize it's 6 p.m. and I haven't even eaten yet! Can you imagine? Not that I'm complaining, though. I love being a mom. But I'll tell you what—sometimes I find it just about impossible to find a spare moment to stimulate my clitoris until I reach glorious climax. » Fake article here

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Why is letter "D" even an option?

Tragic: Morbidly obese aunt crushes two-year-old boy

Authorities believe the 800-pound woman somehow fell on the child, causing a skull fracture. » Read the full article here

Beer pong in the pool? Sweet.

(thanks Chris)

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Hunter mistakes man for Turkey, shoots & kills him.

A camouflaged hunter sitting in a tree was accidentally shot and killed Friday by another hunter trying to shoot a turkey, according to the Polk County Sheriff's Office.

Investigators said Michael Shane Hasting, 40, was hunting with his 6-year-old son and spotted a turkey. Hasting fired at the turkey and moved forward to see if he hit the bird. He then discovered that he accidentally shot Randall Williamson.

Williamson was in the wooded area sitting in what is known as a squatter's chair and wearing camouflage clothing and mesh over his face, according to a Polk County sheriff's news release. He was also holding a camouflage shotgun. Detectives are treating the incident as an accidental shooting and no charges will be filed, according to officials. » Article here

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Moron, it's spelled 'n00b'.

Dude, this dog prays with his master

At a Zen Buddhist temple in southern Japan, even the dog prays. Mimicking his master, priest Joei Yoshikuni, a 1 1/2-year-old black-and-white Chihuahua named Conan joins in the daily prayers at Naha's Shuri Kannondo temple, sitting up on his hind legs and putting his front paws together before the altar.
It took him only a few days to learn the motions, and now he is the talk of the town. "Word has spread, and we are getting a lot more tourists," Yoshikuni said Monday.

"I think he saw me doing it all the time and got the idea to do it, too," Yoshikuni said. » Article here

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