Wednesday, December 28, 2005

I wanted to do this at work today

Woman swallows cell phone b/c of her boyfriend

A woman who police thought deliberately tried to swallow her cell phone during an argument with her boyfriend was apparently the victim of an assault instead, authorities said.

Police have a suspect in the bizarre incident that sent the 24-year-old woman to the hospital last week, Sgt. Allen Kintz said. Police would not say whether the boyfriend was the suspect and would not explain exactly what they believe happened.

"It appears she didn't voluntarily swallow this phone," Kintz said. "It's not quite the way it was first portrayed."

Early Friday, police responded to a call from a Blue Springs man who said his girlfriend was having trouble breathing. Police arrived to find a woman with a cell phone lodged in her throat.

Police were initially told the boyfriend wanted the phone and the woman tried to swallow it so that he could not get it. Article here.

Two mouths on one fish? Not a fish fib...

A rainbow trout fished out of Holmes Lake in Lincoln, Nebraska features a double mouth. Clarence Olberding, 57, of Lincoln, wasn't just telling a fisherman's fib when he called over another angler to look at the two-mouthed trout. It weighed in at about a pound. Olberding, who plans to smoke and eat the fish, said the hook was in the upper mouth, and that the lower one did not appear to be functional.

Woman puts husband's dead body in suitcase?

Police say a woman put her husband in a suitcase after he died in their New York apartment and left him there.

Police discovered the body Monday after neighbors complained about the smell.
They say the woman appeared confused about how long her husband had been dead but she said she wanted to take him to Arizona to be buried, as he had wished.

The man had a heart condition and police don't suspect his wife of a crime. There will be an autopsy to determine what killed him. Article here.

Check out this doggy carrier

What is drunk eMailing? Included: an example!

Generation Y's version of drunk dialing is d-railing, a term meaning e-mailing while drunk.

Technology has introduced a new variety of nightcaps in the form of inebriated e-mailing, texting and online shopping that can lead to bewildering hangovers.

"Drunk e-mailing gives me a chance to say what I want without anyone hanging up on me," said Lola, who was interviewed by The Chronicle but did not want her real name used because of sensitivity about her job. She noted that most drunk e-mails have more substance than drunken-dialing conversations, which are often used to try to hook up. Lola started d-railing eight years ago, and though she said she spell-checks her messages, most drunk e-mails can be easily identified by their grammar and punctuation errors or the time they were sent.

"It's opened a whole new mechanism for people to communicate around the world," he said. "The more liquor that is consumed, the more likely people are to lose their inhibitions."

Weird? Lose their inhibitions? No way! Drinking doesn't do that! Anyways, with that article in mind, check out this great example of a drunk email... I mean, 'd-railing'... (note before you start reading the email, this is from a boyfriend to his girlfriend- it was written at 3 AM):

thank you for the email. I think that you are the best person in the world. Thank you very, very, very much for check my voice mail. By the way I have a law suit against you for invasion of privacy. And I think that you are wonderful. And thank you for not finding the pearl necklace because it was on the front porchase. And by the way her name was Sue not Suzzy. I love you and am pround of being your boyfriend. I can not wait until we get marrie and have 12th little j--- l----'s becuase we both know that we wont alot of kids. Dont worry I got your ring in a machine egg. That how much I love you. You have my heart and I love you too. I hope that you come and bring your family to my graduation pary. My mom and dad cant wait to see you. I told them both that you were pergant. And that we were getting married in two months. So I hope you come, or its going to look like you got an aborsion. So you better show up. I love you and cant wait until you come to the party, and if your not going to show please call my mother who loves you, and tell her that your not going to have my baby. Thank you and cant wait until we get married. "Dont worry I can t wait untill I make love to you." thats a quote from, "Boys to Men." I just want to give you that. I cant wait to see you and my parent are so PROUD.

P.S. "You know when I get that sexual feelin I get that sexual feel, And I want to sex you up" and that is MARVIN GAYE.

And I love you and cant wait to tell your parent how I feel.

Because its just the two of us, and we can make it if we try, time just the two of us. And you know what we are on my own. These quotes are sorry beautiful becuase didnt you know this world is a crazy place, becuase I am going to save the best for last. Dont worry I will always be your endless love

Street pole through the middle of a car? WTF?

How to take the 'perfect power nap'

I am a total advocate for taking ‘power naps’ at anytime of the day to get the 'extra boost' to stay productive. I found some helpful tips in this article from Men's Journal that I’d like to share with other fellow ‘power-nappers.’ Enjoy!

Everyone, no matter how high-strung, has the capacity to nap. But the conditions need to be right. Dr. Sara Mednick, who will publish a book on napping has some helpful hints:

1 The first consideration is psychological: Recognize that you're not being lazy; napping will make you more productive and more alert after you wake up.
2 Try to nap in the morning or just after lunch; human circadian rhythms make late afternoons a more likely time to fall into deep (slow-wave) sleep, which will leave you groggy.
3 Avoid consuming large quantities of caffeine as well as foods that are heavy in fat and sugar, which meddle with a person's ability to fall asleep.
4 Instead, in the hour or two before your nap time, eat foods high in calcium and protein, which promote sleep.
5 Find a clean, quiet place where passersby and phones won't disturb you.
6 Try to darken your nap zone, or wear an eyeshade. Darkness stimulates melatonin, the sleep- inducing hormone.
7 Remember that body temperature drops when you fall asleep. Raise the room temperature or use a blanket.
8 Once you are relaxed and in position to fall asleep, set your alarm for the desired duration (see below).

THE NANO-NAP: 10 to 20 seconds Sleep studies haven't yet concluded whether there are benefits to these brief intervals, like when you nod off on someone's shoulder on the train.
THE MICRO-NAP: two to five minutes Shown to be surprisingly effective at shedding sleepiness.
THE MINI-NAP: five to 20 minutes Increases alertness, stamina, motor learning, and motor performance.
THE ORIGINAL POWER NAP: 20 minutesIncludes the benefits of the micro and the mini, but additionally improves muscle memory and clears the brain of useless built-up information, which helps with long-term memory (remembering facts, events, and names).
THE LAZY MAN'S NAP: 50 to 90 minutesIncludes slow-wave plus REM sleep; good for improving perceptual processing; also when the system is flooded with human growth hormone, great for repairing bones and muscles.

Woman has 14-pound, 3-ounce baby

Hospital officials at McAlester Regional Health Center (Oklahoma) say a 14-pound, 3-ounce baby delivered there is the largest ever born at the hospital. Lillian Elizabeth Ross was born Friday to Adrienne and Anthony Ross.

A hospital spokeswoman said the baby already wears clothes made for children six to nine months old.

"The nursery had to go to pediatrics to get diapers for her because they didn't have any that would fit," Adrienne Ross said. "We've already had to start buying her new clothes. None of the stuff we bought will fit either."

The baby was born by a scheduled cesarean section without any serious complications.

Damn girl. Thas' one big as baby. Her back has to be hurting. It's like she delivered a bowling ball! Article here.

This PacMan dining table is freakin' sweet


A europeon night club is hosting a 31-hour drinking marathon. The session will last from 6pm on Hogmanay to 1:30 AM on January 2.Boozers will be encouraged to drink cheap shots around the clock and prizes will be handed out for those who can stay standing throughout the promotion.

Last night, nightclub bosses were condemned by politicians and anti-alcohol campaigners who accused them of encouraging binge drinking. The 31-hour drinking binge will be held in the 300-capacity nightclub thanks to a special licence.

Barmen will pour free champagne, and those inside can rack up cheap rounds thanks to the cut-price drinks promotions on offer to everyone. Clubbers will get wristbands so they can go home for a sleep, then come back and "top-up" with more booze. Those who stay on their feet and drink for the entire 31 hours are expected to be handed DVD players.

Local councillor Sam Coull said: "This is ridiculous. I can't believe it's been allowed to happen.

Deaths Statistics show nearly 40 people drink themselves to death in Scotland every week - a 250 per cent rise in booze-related deaths in the last 25 years.

Holy fu*kin crap? Where the heck do I start? I mean- if the 31 hours of drinking isn't enough... what about that statistic? Nearly 40 people drink themselves to death each week? WTF? That's not just a problem epidemic if you ask me! Article here.

Niagara Falls photo from Google Maps, whoa?

(click to enlarge photo)

Be careful, burglars will steal your car doors

A bizarre New York crime wave is leaving Toyota car owners doorless. Cops have investigated at least six cases of stolen doors in the last three months. The expensive doors, which can cost up to $5,000 to replace, are nearly impossible to find at salvage yards, creating what some fear may be an emerging black market.

"It's hard to find a used door for Camrys and Highlanders, because owners keep the cars for so long," said Jason Martinez, a damage adjuster for GEICO.

The vehicles are different makes and models, and likely unrelated crimes, a police source said. The thieves sell the doors to chop shops or unscrupulous salvage yards and repair shops. Police say some shops try to pass the doors off as new, pocketing a profit after overcharging customers.

One hapless victim walked outside his home on Utopia Parkway in Flushing about two weeks ago to find the back door of his Toyota Highlander snatched clear off the hinges in his own driveway. Nothing else was missing.

Martinez, who handled that victim's $5,200 insurance claim, said he examined the SUV at the repair shop of a Toyota dealership. While he was there, he saw another Highlander and a Toyota Camry.

Each of the vehicles had a back door missing, and the driver's side lock had been popped. When he went back to his office, he mentioned the bizarre crimes to his colleagues.

"The manufacturers make cars easier to take apart, so they're easier to repair," he said. "It doesn't occur to them that they're also making them easier to steal."
Some criminals are so deft at their craft, they can remove the doors in minutes after disabling alarms and without damaging the vehicles.

We live in a strange strange greedy country. The worst thing about this is you can do NOTHING to stop it. I mean, you can’t go to Best Buy and ask for a ‘door-remover-alarm-thingy.’ Article here.