Friday, October 20, 2006

This is what you get for drinking on a Tuesday

The next big thing: Deep-Fried pizza?

Inspired by the Scots, who have a penchant for deep-frying just about anything, the battered slices at the Atlantic ChipShop taste like a combination of a pizza roll and a mozzarella stick.
The pizza is refrigerated first because, as Mr. Carpenter points out, if it's fresh and the cheese is already melted, it won't hold the batter. Cool slices are dredged in flour then dipped in batter before taking a 2- to 3-minute dip in a bath of 500-degree oil.
A bright-yellow battered slice is dropped into the deep-fryer, dives below the surface for just a moment, and resurfaces with a light-golden tint. The oil around it hisses and bubbles while the shell puffs up noticeably. After a minute or so on one side, Mr. Carpenter flips the slice with a shallow wire strainer and weights it down with a large fryer basket so it cooks evenly.
Cooking time is only as long as it takes for the batter to "brown out," achieving a dark golden color. Article here.

Distasteful costume of the year?

Car drops 18 stories into the Chicago river...

A hot dog costume... for your dog.

Homecoming streaker stops 'Queen' crowning

Spectators at Friday's Wheeler High football game saw more than the anticipated backfield in motion. They saw a Wheeler High junior take off his clothes and streak across the field, just before the crowning of the homecoming queen and king and their court.

Sophomore Caitlin Pitts, 15, said the boy was naked except for a ski mask. She said the athletic director tried to shadow the streaker in order to intercept him, but the boy darted into a nearby cornfield. After a short chase, a group of parents apprehended the boy.

He was not arrested and a police report has not been filed. Union Township School Board President Terry Boehlke said the crowd reaction varied -- from shock to laughter.

Pitts said the school was abuzz with the news. "It's like the best thing ever to happen at Wheeler," Pitts said. Article here.

Dear god... [notes from little children]

Re: Being worst rated player on Madden ‘07

To: John Madden

CC: Electronic Arts Sports

From: Ethan Albright

Re: Being the worst rated player on Madden ‘07

Hi, John, my name is Ethan Albright. I play line for the Washington Redskins. You probably already knew that, so I’ll continue. I am writing in regards to the overall player rating of 53 that I have received in Madden NFL Football 2007. I feel that this is fucking bullshit and you should kiss my mother-fucking ass.

You know what, John? Two can play this game. I rate you a fucking 12. I rate you a fucking 12 in Ethan Albright Football 2000-ever… except for in the category of ball-licking. That is where I will spot you a 98 rating. You will receive this score because I will never give your blubbery ass a 99 in any category. Take that, pencil-dick. Go do Al Micheals or something. Boom. Score one for Red Beard.

I guess I just can’t fathom the fact that I am the absolute worst player rated out of the entire NFL. Fuck, man, there are some shitty guys out there. Amongst everyone, I was rated the absolute worst, [Click here to continue reading this hilarious article].

Dude swears at David Letterman [semi-funny]

I thought he was going to break out into song for a minute there...

Dude kills himself after he mutilated girlfriend

After hurricane Katrina, Zackery Bowen and girlfriend Adriane Hall appeared in news stories as examples of young people who had pressed on in the battered city despite evacuation orders and a lack of power and water.

Their story came to a disturbing end this week: Bowen leaped to his death from a hotel, leaving a note that led police to a French-Quarter apartment where they found a woman's charred head on the stove, limbs in the oven and torso in the refrigerator.

Bowen's note said he had strangled and dismembered his girlfriend, but did not mention her name, police said Wednesday. Authorities said that because of the condition of the dismembered woman's body they could not immediately identify her.

In the note, Bowen wrote: "I scared myself not by the action of calmly strangling the woman I've loved for one and a half years . . . but by my entire lack of remorse," according to the Times-Picayune newspaper, which said it had obtained a copy of the note.

Bowen wrote that he had $1,500 in cash and spent it lavishly before killing himself, the newspaper reported: "So that's what I did: good food, good drugs, good strippers, good friends and any loose ends I may have had." Article here.