Wednesday, January 18, 2006

Clever camera timing + good form = great picture

No really, this guys name is: Fuk King Kwok

Fuk King Kwok was waiting for his driver's license to be printed when his name was called and a chuckling Illinois secretary of state employee offered some advice.

"She [said] this is a dangerous name," the Chinese immigrant recalled. "She [said] the name translated is not so good, maybe I should change [it]. The word I hear is not so good."

That clerk, like so many other Americans who have said his name since he came to Chicago in 1999, didn't pronounce his first name the proper way -- "fook."

Instead, she and the others would pronounce his name with an "uh" sound instead of the "oo" -- in other words, like the granddaddy of all swear words.

Last month in Cook County Circuit Court -- three years after that clerk offered the advice -- Fuk King Kwok changed his name. He's now Andy Kwok.

"Before I came to United States, no problems," he said, before nervously laughing. "But in translation to English, it sounds like . . . the word . . . you know ... sometimes language is not so convenient and sometimes I'm embarrassed, you know?"

So what’d he do? He got his name legally changed. The process of legally changing your name is simple enough. Kwok paid the $328 and filled out the one-page form himself.

A judge's signature made it official and ensured the only time Kwok will hear that word is if he's near someone foul-mouthed.

After laughing at this poor guys misfortune of hearing people laugh day after day when hearing his name, I raised an eyebrow to the fact it only costs $328 to get your name changed. Then I also thought… why should it be expensive to get your name changed? I guess you just figure that to get your name changed, you would have to ‘jump through a lot of hoops’ and paperwork. I guessed wrong. Article here.

Not your ordinary kitchen knife set

10 Things Men Shouldn't Yell In Victoria's Secret

10.) Does this come in children's sizes?
9.) No thanks, just sniffing.
8.) I'll be in the dressing room going blind.
7.) Mom will love this.
6.) Oh, the size won't matter. She's inflatable.
5.) No need to wrap it up. I'll eat it here.
4.) Will you model this for me???
3.) The Miracle What??? This is better than world peace!!
2.) 45 bucks?? You're just gonna end up NAKED anyway!!
1.) Oh, honey, you'll never squeeze your fat ass into that.

How to silently humiliate that person you hate...

Company MANIFESTO: "Welcome to 'Sticker Revenge'... want to put your friend, neighbor, co-worker or enemy in a compromising position? Do it with Sticker Revenge. Think our stickers are in absolutely poor taste? You're catching on"

Click here to see the entire store of stickers, pretty funny stuff (kind of border-line sketchy comments). I'm totally ordering one of these for the next road trip I take with one of my buddies.







Just like the real thing...

Man arrested after falling asleep at drive-thru

A man was arrested for drug charges in Clermont after falling asleep at a drive-thru.

Police say Richard Sibila III was asleep at the wheel at the Wendy's on State Road 50.

After waking him up, police gave him a field sobriety test... he told them he wanted "five double cheeseburgers and a frosty." When police searched his car, they found cocaine and marijuana. He's charged with drug possession.

How funny is this? Article here.

Remember how that one song goes? Just tap it!

This site lets you search for a song, by tapping the rhythm of its words (lyrics).

Let's say you have a song stuck in your head, and you don't know the name of it. Never fear! Load up our
search screen, and try tapping the rhythm of the song on your space bar while humming the tune. Tap the space bar for each syllable that you sing. It's that simple!

Click here to check out songtapper.com.

A smoker's ambitious hallucination

Grandpa runs over 11-year-old's head with truck

An 11-year-old boy had a lingering headache two days after a pickup truck ran over his head. "All I remember about it was that when the truck ran over my head, I could hear my bones crack," Cameron Schuette said Tuesday.

Cameron, a 5th-grader and his 13-year-old brother Tyler were helping their grandfather chop and load wood on Sunday. The boys were sitting on the tailgate of their grandfather's truck when he began backing down his gravel driveway and Cameron either fell or jumped off.

Ron Shurley said he at first thought he ran over a piece of wood until he got out of the truck and saw Cameron lying face down in the gravel. Then he stood up and ran into the house, Shurley said.

After spotting blood running out of the boy's ear, Shurley drove him to the hospital. Cameron was then transferred to another hospital, where tests revealed he had a slight hairline skull fracture. He also had roadrash on his neck and face, a black eye and a laceration on his ear canal.

He was released from the hospital Tuesday, suffering a stiff neck and a headache.

Holy crap grandpa!?! Let’s try physically turning around and watching the kids hanging off the truck next time you are backing up? Huh? I mean, I know it was an accident- but this could have ended really bad. The bright side is he’ll have an excuse he can leverage when he gets older… “Yeah, I’m not that smart because my head was run-over by a pick-up truck when I was a kid.” Article here.

Too good to be true

The truth about famous myths...

Myth #1: A penny dropped from the top of a tall building could kill a pedestrian

Truth: A penny isn't the most aerodynamic of weapons. A combination of its shape and wind friction means that, tossed even from the 1,250-foot Empire State Building, it would travel fast enough merely to sting an unlucky pedestrian.

--

Myth #2: You get less wet by running in the rain

Truth: Actual mathematical equations devoted to this popular question have suggested it is true, though not for the simple reasons you might think. Complexities include factoring in the number of rain drops hitting the walker's head versus smacking the runner's chest.


Click here to read the truth about 20 other popular myths.

Two-year-old is called for jury duty

Kaylee Reynolds had a problem when she recently received a summons to serve on a jury. She wasn't old enough to read it.

The 2-year-old has quite a few years to go before she reaches the minimum age of 18 to serve on a state jury. Lucky for Kaylee, Massachusetts Jury Commissioner Patricia Reynolds seemed willing to let it slide for a while.

"We'll give her a 16-year grace period," Wood told The Standard-Times of New Bedford.

Wood guessed the mix-up could be traced to a local census form. If the form has a blank or mistaken birth date, July 4, 1776 is filled in. "With that date we'll know it is wrong," Wood said.

Besides her questionable understanding of the concepts of guilt or innocence, there are other reasons why it's best to wait for Kaylee to serve. Her mother, Patricia, says Kaylee gets really cranky if she doesn't get her noontime nap. Article here.

What's up little dude!?!

Top 10 Wackiest Conspiracy Theories

10.) Dinosauroid-like Alien Reptiles are dominating the World
9.) Apollo 11 Moon Landings were faked by NASA
8.) September 11 was orchestrated by the U. S. government
7.) Barcodes are really intended to Control people
6.) Charlemagne never existed, is a fictional character
5.) The Truth is out there, on Area 51
4.) Microsoft sends messages on Wingdings Font
3.) U.S. military caused the 2004 Indian Ocean Tsunami
2.) The Nazis had a Moon Base
1.) Kentucky Fried Chicken makes black men impotent

Click here to read more about each of these wacky conspiracy theories.