Friday, August 18, 2006

WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF? WTF?

Drunk father says 4-year-old crashed his car

Police said a man accused of drunken driving told them his 4-year-old son was at the wheel of his sport utility vehicle when it crashed into a tree.

They said 33-year-old Albert Monroe Boyce Jr., of Hyndman, told them his son, who was sitting on his lap, had turned the wheel too far to one side, sending the SUV careening off the road.

Police said Boyce had an open 30-pack of Budweiser and a cooler in the vehicle when the crash occurred.

Boyce faces a preliminary hearing Sept. 21 on charges of drunken driving, child endangerment, reckless endangerment and driving without a license. Boyce received facial injuries in the crash, and the child was treated and released for unspecified injuries. Article here.

Drunk Kelly Clarkson sings with Metal Skool


The video is Kelly Clarkson drunk at a "Metal Skool" concert... she proceeded to go on stage, chug Chivas Regal straight from the bottle and perform with the members. She was at the concert with the lead singer from the band "Yellowcard".

This video really is pretty funny – “Metal Skool’s” comments are raunchy as hell, Kelly is drunk and rocks out, and the Yellowcard dude just seems out of place. Not that I really care, but you wouldn’t figure 1.)Kelly Clarkson would go to a concert like this, 2.)She would wear an outfit like she did. But then again, she’s a pretty laid back chick-a from Texas. Good stuff, I love quality live performances -- it’s one of the last real non-commercialized ‘real’ things in the world… I could go on, but for now I’ll just leave it at that :)

Kansas kid gets perfect score on ACT and SAT

Wichita Kansas - A perfect score on the American College Testing exam is rare enough. Same goes for perfection on the SAT Reasoning Test. Acing both? No statistics are available on how many students manage that feat, but it's a safe bet that Bishop Carroll High School senior Jakub Voboril doesn't have a lot of company.

"Suffice it to say, it's a very, very small number," said Brian O'Reilly, a spokesman for the College Board, which administers the SAT.

Voboril, 17, learned last month that he had scored a 36 on his ACT, which he took in June. His perfect score, one of only two in Kansas on the June test, came after he scored 32 and 34 on his first two tries.

"Part of me said, 'That's good enough. You can stop there,'" he said. "But I decided to take it one more time to see what happened." The perfect score came despite a bad night before the ACT.

"I get really nervous before tests," he said, "so I didn't sleep very well that night." He took the SAT the same week. Those results — a perfect 2400 — came in shortly after Voboril got his ACT scores.

About 1.5 million students took the SAT last year, and fewer than 300 got perfect scores.

He has no quick answer for how he did so well. "It's weird, because before I took it, I checked out a couple books from the library. I expected there to be this big secret that all the smart people had that I just had to read. Article here.

"Ghost riding the whip"... the new craze.

"Ghost riding the whip." Ghost riding involves leaving the wheel of a moving car and walking, running, or dancing beside it.

It's a craze that's catching on, especially on the Internet, with young people making and posting hundreds of ghost-riding videos online.

Teens ghost ride on suburban roads, in parking lots, and on the freeway. Some of the stunts are highly choreographed, with kids jumping in and out of moving cars. Read more about Ghost Riding here, or see the video below for an example.

Steve-O is not popular, calls Lindsay Lohan

Man dies after being sucked into wood chipper

A 30-year-old man was killed this afternoon when he was sucked into a wood chipper while trying to shake loose a piece of wood that had jammed it.

The man was using his foot to clear debris that had jammed the wood chipper around 5:20 p.m. when his foot became entangled in the machine, witnesses told police. His coworkers tried to rescue him from the intake, but he was pulled into and through the wood chipper, according to the release.

The incident remains under investigation by Pleasant Prairie detectives, the Kenosha County Medical Examiner's office and officials from the Occupational Safety and Health Administration. Police withheld the man's name while they attempted to notify his family. Article here.

My friends live by this motto too

Woman drives neighbors car through house?

Helen Holt’s Garland home suffered just such an injury Wednesday, when the 62-year-old drove a neighbor’s car into the front of her own house, through the garage and kitchen, out the back, across the yard, through the fence, across the alley and into a ditch.

“I was thinking, ‘I’m just going to try to get it in my driveway and get it stopped,” she said. “But it accelerated and the brakes wouldn’t work.”

She was trying to return her neighbor’s car, a 1989 Ford Crown Victoria, by backing it into his driveway across the street from her house in the 1000 block of Quebec Drive. But, she said, the accelerator stuck and the car hit her neighbor’s pickup truck, knocking it into his garage door. Then she put the car into drive and it took off across the street toward her house.
“I loaned it to her to go to the store to cash her check,” said Jimmy Harrington, Ms. Holt’s 67-year-old across-the-street neighbor, who said the car must have just gotten away from her. That’s the best I can figure out,” he said as he watched a wrecker driver hook up his Ford.

Ms. Holt scraped her forehead and bruised her nose, but remained at home after the accident. Sitting next to what used to be her kitchen, she sipped a Natural Light and smoked a cigarette to calm her nerves. “My nose doesn’t hurt now,” she said, “but it probably will later.” Article here.

When life just blows... Fukitol

The most overused business phrase this year:

"At the end of the day", is the most overused business cliche, according to Factiva, owned by Dow Jones Reuters Business Interactive L.L.C.

For the first six months of the year, Factiva combed through the nation's major media outlets and discovered that the top business cliche was at the end of the day - used 12,460 times. Runners-up were in the black at 4,876 and its colorful cousin in the red at 4,628.

In the 10 years I've been covering business, there is no phrase I hate more than at the end of the day, the New Agey replacement for the Old Biz stalwart bottom line. Bottom line at least sounded like business, not like some guru pontificating.
Bottom line didn't even make this year's list of business cliches. It has been replaced by others - level playing field, time and again, and wealth of experience, none of which is particularly painful.

Mercifully, we are no longer running ideas up the flagpole. However, the Factiva survey found, we're still trying to think outside the box.

Actually, the box thing intrigues me. People treat the box as evil - they always want to think outside of it. I prefer to embrace the box - paint it purple, turn it on its corner, add feathers. Why, at the end of the day, are outside and inside the only box choices? Article here.

Laughing baby

Couple finds naked drunk woman in their yard

Cecil and Denise Allred's Sunday night began by eating dinner at KFC. They returned home to a body in their front yard.

There in the mud a few feet from the house, someone lay in a fetal position. Pants and underwear were pulled down to the ankles. "Don't go out there," he told his wife. "Call the sheriff."
When Allred, a 51-year-old retired mason, went back outside for further investigation, the body tried to stand up. Not dead, he concluded. A live woman.

Partly undressed. Fully intoxicated.

"I wasn't about to touch the lady," he would say later. "I guess she was going to the restroom, I don't know." As best he can remember, their conversation went like this:

She: "I live here."
He: "No you don't. You need to get up and leave."

As they waited for the deputies, the Allreds stayed in the house. The woman eventually pulled her pants up and commenced to bang on the front door. By then they had locked it.

"We were just laughing, mostly," Cecil Allred said.

Sheriff's deputies arrived at 8:45 p.m. They identified the woman as Jacquilin Leeper, 52, who lives on Marigold Drive, less than a mile away.

According to his report, the deputy made several offers to drive Leeper home. She refused. "She became belligerent and swung at me," Deputy Clifford Baltzer wrote. She was charged with disorderly intoxication in a public place.
Denise Allred said that in more than 20 years on Randee Road, she has never seen anything so strange.

"The last thing you expect," she said, "is to go out your door, go to the side of your house and find a naked woman." Article here.