Thursday, December 22, 2005

The 'brutally blunt' tank-top

(click to enlarge)

Strapless flip-flops a.k.a. topless sandals

Topless sandals (also called "down unders") are flip-flops with no straps. How the hell does it work? Topless sandals stick to the bottom of your feet, but leave no residue on your feet when you take them off! The "stick" is guaranteed for a year, which is the typical life span of a flip flop. They are only $15. I’m still kind of skeptical on the mysterious ‘sticky’ substance that makes this product work. However, if it is legit- this is pretty damn cool. Click here to buy one.

Firefighter drops pants for webcam prank

A Milwaukee fire lieutenant is suspected of performing a lewd act in front of a computer camera which occurred on computers at two firehouses within the last month.

One night in late November or early December, the lieutenant was in a computer chat room, corresponding with a woman he thought he knew, the sources said. Actually, a group of firefighters at a different station were given the woman's password and posing as her.

At the request of someone whom he thought was the woman, the lieutenant partially disrobed and masturbated in front of a computer camera, which sent the images back to the other station where the firefighters looked on, the sources said. The sources said the incident was a gag meant to fill down time at the station. A female firefighter reported the incident. At least one of the computers used in the incident was a personal computer and was seized, sources said.

Unlike the Police Department, the Fire Department does not conduct many investigations into alleged employee misconduct.

Outside help might be needed if the investigation involves technical computer issues. He said a deeper look into what firefighters do on their down time might be done later.

"What we have to do is get through this investigation first and take the other issues as they come," he said.

This is what ‘firefighters do to fill down time?’ We pay for these guys to do jerk-off at work (haha, I had to say it)? Anyways, this still is kind of funny. This is one of those things that is hilarious at the time… but afterwards, it has horrible repercussions. Case in point, this practical joke gone bad. Article here.

Some witty doormats

Thieves smash wall of a store with a bulldozer!?!

Some heavy-handed thieves smashed through the wall of a jewelry store with a bulldozer in a botched attempt to make off with the contents of a safe.

The break-in occurred between 4 and 5 a.m. from a back parking lot, the brazen burglars knocked down the wall using the bulldozer's front blade. They then used the heavy machinery to load the safe onto either a pickup truck or dump truck.

The suspects ditched the bulldozer in the parking lot and drove off in the getaway vehicle, but apparently turned too quickly at the corner jettisoning the safe onto the asphalt, the source added.

Cops from the Street Crime Unit recovered the safe, still unopened, police said.

"It was like something out of a Hollywood movie." said the source.

Although the value of what was in the safe and its contents were not officially made public, the source said store owner John Buonocore seemed upset that expensive Christmas gifts and other high-priced items being stored therein might have been the intended target.

Yeah...uh...except the fact that this heist was completely unsuccessful, you gotta admit- what a great plan? Oh well, there’s always next time . I don’t know how they could of thought everything out so perfectly, and then screwed it up by just not ‘securing’ the safe in their getaway car. Article here.

You know you got a video game addiction when

So I’d consider myself a little above average casual GAMEer, but good god- if I ever get so into video games that I consider buying this product below, I think I’ll probably need to see a doctor.

This product claims to help relieve the stress from your waist and arms. Cost? 4,179 Yen or about $36 U.S. dollars + shipping.

Random Phrase of the Day

Your mission for the day? Somehow figure out a way to use this phrase in a conversation:

Honky-tonky Honky tonk ba-donka-donk.

Let me know how it goes.

Santa get pulled over by the fuzz, DUI?

Watch this video. Good for a chuckle.

(click image to watch video)

Caption this...

Pictures from the New York transit strike

Check out this galleria of pictures from the NYC transit strike. I still can’t fathom that transportation in New York has been brought to a grinding halt. Let alone the legality of the union that is striking. Crazy sh*t. Click here to see a whole Flickr gallery. Maybe I’ll organize a strike at my work next week? Probably not. But you can imagine what that'd be like?

Dad fired ... for make his kids happy for x-mas

A single father of three was fired for taking chocolate bars from a garbage bin at the store we worked at.

Guy Masse, 47, had planned to give the discarded chocolate to his children, aged 6, 9 and 15, for Christmas. Masse, who was on welfare and had been working at the store only for a couple of months, was first suspended and then fired.

Zellers, which is part of Toronto-based retailer Hudson's Bay Co., has said Masse should have notified his supervisor he was taking the chocolate out of the garbage at the St-Hyacinthe store, about 50 kilometres east of Montreal.

"It's a very unfortunate situation. We would never have willingly let an associate go at this time of year without just cause," said Hudson's Bay spokeswoman Hillary Stauth. "Unfortunately, this associate breached the trust of his supervisors by removing merchandise from the store, and as a result, he was let go from his position."

WTF? They fired this guy for trying to make his children happy. He was is a position in which he doesn’t have a lot of money- and he is trying to support a family. Hmmm… lets think about this business decision. Not only did they lose an employee in which they now must take the time to re-hire and re-train a new one, but they are also getting the WORST negative press possible. Why in the hell would you want to be known as the company that fired ‘that’ guy. The managers/corporate executives should of thought this one through a little better. Article here.

Get excited... a 'lil peek-a-boo of her who-ha

Paperboy reaches 10 million delivery’s

Eric Smith is dedicated. How so? He delivers The Chronicle (a newspaper), roughly 1,000 issues every morning in the Berkeley hills. Smith, who turns 65 next month, has delivered papers seven days a week, 365 days a year for the past 28 years -- without a day off. That works out to about 10 million deliveries.

"It is labor intensive and detail intensive,'' Smith says. "You've got to put your heart and soul into it.''

He has. And that is why it is such a laugh that a couple of cheap scam artists thought they could fool his customers with a Christmas card, seeking holiday tips.

They slipped fake cards -- complete with their home addresses -- into the papers of several of his customers last week after Smith delivered them, hoping no one would notice.

Here's the problem. Subscribers up on Grizzly Peak Boulevard know their newspaper carrier. Their newspaper carrier is a friend of theirs. And these guys were not their newspaper carrier.

Frankly, in the annals of crime, you'd have to say that these two are unlikely to go down as criminal masterminds. For starters, just as a general rule, you don't want to provide your address at the scene of the crime.

Second, if you are going to rip someone off, you might be better off not to pretend to be taking the place of one of the icons of the neighborhood.

I don't want to tip anybody off or anything, but if the guys who tried to pull this Grinch-like trick are reading along, this would be a good time to make a run for it. The police have been notified, and because you left your addresses -- one in Pinole and one in Richmond -- on the back of the card, I'm guessing it won't be that hard to locate you.

Eric Smith only drives convertibles on his route. "I can throw 360 degrees,'' he says. "For a while, I was putting the top up and taking it down, but then I saw these little cracks appearing so I thought I just better leave the top down.''

Since becoming a newspaper deliveryman more than four decades ago, Smith has taken only one break.

"I started, full time, on this route in 1964,'' he says. "At one point, I had an appendix about to burst, so I had to take some time off. I left the day Elvis Presley died (Aug. 17, 1977) and I came back on Dec. 19, 1977.''

He's got the whole system down to a science.

Smith has a 3-million candlepower spotlight to search out the rare paper that lands in the bushes, and one of those reach-and-grab arm extensions to pull papers out from under cars. "I throw with both hands,'' he says.

"Somebody once told me they saw me with three papers in the air at the same time.''

And then, of course, there was that magical Fourth of July when there was an unusually small newspaper and the calm conditions were perfect for paper pitching.

"I got about halfway through and I thought, things are going swimmingly,'' Smith says. "I did the whole thing in one hour and 59 minutes. But if I'd known I was going for a record, I could have had it down to 1:45 at least.''

It hasn't been a bad life, Smith figures. He's put his two kids through St. Mary's, a private high school, and his daughter just graduated from UC Santa Cruz. His dad, who started the route in 1952, bought a house in Berkeley in the '50s, and his son still lives there.

He says his plan is to throw papers "until I am 100 or die, whichever comes first.'' And that will be the end of the line. Smith says he doubts his son, Hiroshi, 24, will take over.

"He hasn't decided what he wants to do,'' Smith says. "But it isn't this.''
Oh, and Smith wants his customers to know that his Christmas cards will be going out this weekend. Take a moment and give something up for a guy who loves his job.

Wow. I didn’t know a columnist from San Francisco Gate could write so long about something so simple- a guy who just delivers newspapers. On the contrary, it is refreshing to hear about a great person who loves their job/life. I guess between the homicides/murders/scams stories you could say it’s instances like this that make the news ‘readable’ each day. Good stuff Eric Smith. Rock on man. Article here.

Ah, silly ass cows and chickens up to no good