Tuesday, June 12, 2007

The unemployed 'stuff to do' list.


Toilet water at middle school, cleaner than water fountain?

Middle School student Kyleray Katherman for an English assignment, he tested the bacteria content at four water fountains and one toilet to challenge a ban on students from bringing bottled water to class. It seems some were using it to sneak in alcohol.

Guess which was cleaner? It wasn't the water fountains.

Classmates, teachers, administrators and board members said they had no idea. Katherman, 13, used Q-tips and petri dishes, swabbing the spigots of four fountains and sampling one toilet, dunking the cotton in the bowl's center and then dragging it around the rim for a complete sample.

He took the results to the school lab put them under a light to speed up the bacteria's growth. The petri dishes with fountain water were swarming with bacteria. The sample from the toilet was clean, probably because the toilets are doused with cleansing chemicals daily. Administrators quickly replaced the spigots and casing at three of the water fountains and custodians gave them all a thorough cleaning. » Full article here

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OMG, you gotta feel bad for this girl. So embarrassing.

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Dude forgets his severed finger in bathroom after bar fight

A man who lost part of his finger in a bar brawl walked out of the pub and down the street before he noticed it was gone, police said Monday.

"He was out on the street and realized there was blood on his hand, noticed his finger was missing, and went to hospital." Security guards later found the severed finger "and a large amount of blood" in the pub's bathroom.

The 42-year-old man, whose identity was not released, was being treated for his injuries. Police brought the severed finger to the hospital, but did not say whether it was being reattached. » Article here


I hear they taste like chicken.


Paris Hilton 'super fan' loses it after announcement.

Paris Hilton Super Fan Loses It - Watch more free videos


Stop pumping it like a girl, there's a line -- oh stop crying already.

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Husband writes profanities on wife; wife attacks husband

A woman who woke up to find profanities written on her arms, legs and back ended up in jail Thursday.

While she was asleep, her husband scrawled the words on her with an ink pen, according to a County Sheriff's Office report. Seeing the markings caused her to fly into a rage and start fighting with her husband. While the two wrestled, she bit her husband in the stomach and back, the report said.

She admitted to police that she bit her husband twice and threatened him with a wooden board, the report says. The woman was released Friday, according to the jail's online log. » Article here

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Take off those silly-ass slippers.


[semi-sorta interesting] hot Lithuanian women wrestling in honey

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'Hiccup girl' runs away from home? she's missing?

The 15-year-old girl whose marathon case of hiccups made international news earlier this year has apparently run away from home, police said Monday.

Jennifer Mee's struggles with chronic hiccups — up to 50 times a minute for months — made her an Internet sensation and darling of morning television news shows, who aggressively fought to book the ninth-grader for interviews.

The hiccups that forced her out of school have only been sporadic recently, said her mother, Rachel Robidoux. » Full article here


I guess 'Britain's got Talent'. Even Simon's impressed.

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Photoworthy: the tunnel house


Lindsay Lohan's body guard quit -- then tells all.

Lindsay Lohan's bodyguard for the past two years quit recently because it was too dangerous. Not that the threats against Lindsay were too dangerous, but that Lindsay was too dangerous. The News of the World says Lindsay:

Attacked a gun-wielding cocaine dealer for ripping her off, Snorted line after line with Simple Life star Nicole Richie in a ten-hour binge, Slashed her wrists with knives, sobbing that she "didn't belong on this planet", enjoyed frenzied lesbian romps with scores of girls she picked up at parties — and even made a play for chart star Mariah Carey.
A direct quote from Weaver: "I have looked after some of the wildest stars in Hollywood — but never anyone as out of control as Lindsay is. She had a total death wish and took more drugs and drank more than anyone I've met."

The final straw came when she attacked a coke dealer: "In April she asked me to take her to her dealer in Beverly Hills. I knew if I refused she'd go alone — so I took her. He was waiting for her in some bushes. Suddenly she started screaming and punching him for selling her short.
He pulled a gun. I got out and he threatened to shoot me unless I got her to back off — but she kept hitting him. Luckily he got distracted and I punched him down. I dragged Lindsay into the car and drove off but she was screaming at me to go back. It was like Pulp Fiction. I knew then she was just too dangerous to be around." » Article here

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Dude on the Price is Right is a moron. Bob get's pissed.


Woman named 'Butts' caught stealing toliet paper

A woman was discovered taking toilet paper from the courthouse, according to police reports, something she has apparently been adept at doing for a quite a while.

No one could remember exactly when, but toilet paper started disappearing at “unusually high rates,” even for county employees, said a source close to the problem. It had long ago been suspected that the problem was more than just overactive bowels, but no one could quite prove it.

“A courthouse employee saw her walk from a storeroom carrying a bag of toilet paper,” said Marshalltown Police Chief Lon Walker. The woman allegedly involved in the situation, Suzanne Marie Butts, has been referred to as the toilet paper bandit by some county employees.

Because of prior convictions, Butts faces up to two years in prison — for three rolls of toilet paper.
Butts has prior theft convictions, as well as several other theft charges which are pending. » Article here


Caught with his foot in his mouth... literally.

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The famous Conan O'Brien 'Walker Texas Ranger' lever


Police on lookout for dude wearing diaper at gas stations

Tulsa police are looking for a man who's been wearing a diaper inside at least three south Tulsa convenience stores. The man also exposed himself on at least one occasion to a store employee.

Officers said the man walks into the stores' bathrooms wearing clothes then comes out wearing the diaper. The man has told some witnesses he's acting on a dare. Police said the man is white, slender and in his mid 20s. » Article here