Monday, November 21, 2005

160-character text message in two minutes?

An Ohio girl won $5,000 this week by typing out a 160-character text message on a cell phone in two minutes, 23 seconds.

Troy Field, 17, had hoped to set a world record with her flying fingers, but fell short of the goal set by competition sponsor Alltel. A woman in Singapore holds the record at 43 seconds.

For the competition, the five finalists in the contest had to write out:

The razor-toothed piranhas of the genera Serrasalmus and Pygocentrus are the most ferocious freshwater fish in the world. In reality they seldom attack a human.

Yeah, this is nuts. Just try it on your own. I mean holy crap these guys must be fast. I wonder what phone they require them to use? Can it be anyone they choose? Do they use T9? Hmmm... regardless, its fu*kin hard to write those two sentences. Article here.

How many bowls = the fiber of one Colon Blow?

How many bowls of your oat bran cereal would it take to equal the fiber content of one bowl of Colon Blow? Guess again. God this 'parody commercial' is hilarious. Phil Hartman was a comedy genius. Click here to watch the commercial.

(click image to watch commercial)

Bill Gates poses for a Windows 1.0 ad... sexy?

Kid suspended for urinating in a ice machine?

A student at a high school urinated in an ice machine in the gymnasium, and that at least 31 people — staff and students alike — used the machine before it was reported to school officials.

The boy, who was not identified, has been suspended for 10 days, pending an expulsion hearing. School law officials say charges will be filed. He was released to his parents.

The boy told officials he dropped his pants around 1:30 p.m. Wednesday — just before physical education class — and urinated in the ice machine in the lobby of the school’s gymnasium. Another student had dared him to do it.

The ice machine was immediately taken out of service after it had been in use for over a day. But by that time a number of people, including basketball players who practiced at the gym after school, had used the machine. School officials contacted the Department of Public Health in Frankfort, but health officials said there was no need to worry and no one needed to be tested.

“They said it was gross and morally wrong, but not a health risk.” Health officials said urine is sterile because the body has its own filtering system. If any bacteria did make it through, the ice’s temperature would have killed it.

As for the boy, charges will be filed, but officials were still trying to figure out what to charge him with. The fate of the ice machine hasn’t been determined yet. If school officials decide to use it again, it will be cleaned thoroughly. Click here to read the full article.

Yeah, so playing pranks in high school is always fun. But there is always the kid who takes it a little too far. This is one of them. Still, you gotta admit- this is hilarious. Grand it, none of use would feel the same if we had any of the ‘fouled’ ice from the machine… but to read about it- it makes for a good laugh.

Tigers make great pets in Dubai...

This picture is real. What you may not know, is that many people complain of the exotic animals that all the rich people have in Dubai... click here to read more.

Lying can get you places in life- no really it can

Liar, liar, pants on fire... We tell one lie for every three minutes our mouths are open. Men and women tell different kinds of lie, and attractive people are the biggest fibbers of all. So why do we do it? The latest evidence shows that lying might be essential for our survival... click here to read the full article.

Don’t judge her by the shirt she’s wearing

Boyfriend attacks girlfriend with a cactus!?!

A 22-year-old man was charged for allegedly attacking his girlfriend with a cactus plant and biting her, leaving her "covered in blood," according to a criminal complaint.

"I thought I'd seen everything … but a cactus beating, jeez," said the County District Attorney. "I guess it's the thing that was closest at hand."

According to the complaint, the girlfriend said her boyfriend was upset over some phone calls he had made earlier in the evening but otherwise could not explain the attack. The girlfriend told police that her boyfriend attacked her with the cactus while she was doing dishes in the apartment they shared. The attack was unprovoked, she told police.
The woman had half-inch cactus thorns stuck in her neck, face and arms that medical staff had to remove with tweezers, the complaint said.

She also suffered a "very large" bite mark on her left forearm, a ruptured eardrum, a deep cut in her upper lip that required several stitches and bruises on her face and jaw, the complaint said.

"He was drinking, he got depressed … and he just lit off on her for some reason."

Police had to threaten to use pepper spray on the boyfriend before they could take him into custody, and he still was out of control at the police station. "He was yelling and screaming and kicking at the doors."

If convicted, the boyfriend faces nine years, three months in jail and fines of up to $11,000. The boyfriend has no previous convictions for violent offenses, but was cited twice for disorderly conduct in separate incidents in June. He is in the county jail on $10,000 cash bond and is due in court on Nov. 23 for a preliminary hearing. Click here to read the full article.

Uh… yeah… WTF? Are you kidding? A fu*kin cactus? I guess it could have been worse. And he bit her freakin’ arm too? What the heck was he doing? Turning into a vampire? This dude really does have some issues he needs to sit-down and work out.

A cool little trick with two F-16s

Burger King employee cuts throat of customer

An argument between a Burger King employee and a customer ended in bloodshed. The altercation escalated until the customer's throat was slashed.

The argument started at the drive through window. The customer apparently got the wrong order at Burger King and complained with an employee.

The employee, in turn, according to witnesses, slashed the victim across the throat with a still yet to be determined sharp cutting instrument.

It happened in the parking lot in front of the restaurant. When police got there they found the victim bleeding and in pretty bad shape. Police say they have a pretty good idea of the kind of weapon that was used to slash the customer.

The employee is being charged with first degree assault and held on $500,000 bond. Click here to read the article.

Yeah, uh… I complain at fast food restaurants all the time! Maybe I should rethink my behavior? I mean, I know I really hate when I get onions on a hamburger… but if it came down to it being life or death, uh, well, lets just say I think I’ll just deal with swallowing onions.

Caption this...

Daughter sells camera mom with sex tape in it

A teenager sold more than her mother's video camera for $200, but sold it not knowing a home video of her mother and her mother's boyfriend engaged in an ‘intimate act’ was in the camera.

The mother learned the camera was missing, when the boyfriend called and complained the tape was being shown around town. The daughter, now 19, admitted she'd taken the camera from her mother's bedroom closet and sold it to a friend.

The mother called police and her daughter was charged with theft. The daughter pleaded guilty Wednesday to charges of theft under $5,000, failing to attend court and two counts breach of probation. Click here to read the article.

Holy sh*t this is hilarious! The boyfriend said that people are ‘showing the video around town.’ What does that mean? Like in a theater? At peoples houses? Internet? Are there copies just floating around to different peoples houses for fun? Oh well… looks like her life as well as her family is pretty much ruined in this town forever.

Britney = still ugly, Kevin = trying to be black?

(click images to enlarge)

Love Potion Number 9 made a reality...

A new nasal spray aphrodisiac for women that works in minutes may soon hit the market. Doctors said women who used the drug in test studies felt a tingling or throbbing followed by a strong desire to have sex immediately after spraying their noses.

This drug is a synthetic version of a sex hormone that works on both men and women. In the case of women, the drug sensitizes the vaginal tissue, so when they get touched or stimulated, they feel more.

"It's a very simple product to use," spokesperson said. "Essentially, you take off the protective cap and place it at the base of your nostril and then they would just activate the device while breathing normally.”

The sex drug is made by in New Jersey, Palatin Technologies Inc. Click here to read the article.

Whoa, I’m really not sure if I believe what I’m reading… and if this drug is released to the public, it’s only a matter of time till this is abused. Still kind of crazy that this works on both men and women.

The fire alarm that plays 80's music?

Check out this SNL skit about 'a different' type of fire alarm. Good for a chuckle. Click here to watch the video.

(click image to watch video)

Anna Nicole Smith's Mug Shot...

Drinking ice water can help you lose weight?

Can you really lose weight by drinking ice water? Yes. Wait- what? How? Simply put, your body burns calories warming up the water. Your body burns calories when it has to raise the temperature of ice water to your body temperature.

If you adhere to the "eight 8-ounce glasses of water a day" nutritional recommendation… in 64 ounces of water, there are 1,892.72 grams. So to warm up all that water in the course of a day, your body burns 70,030 calories, or 70 Calories. And over time, that 70 Calories a day adds up. So, while you definitely shouldn't depend on ice water consumption to replace exercise or a healthy diet, drinking cold water instead of warm water does, in fact, burn some extra calories. Click here to read an more in-depth article describing the process.

Sister Teresa has a mean right arm...

Brand New 30GB Color iPod for only $249?

So if you look carefully on most electronic manufacture’s websites you’ll find a sale section usually titled, “Special Deals.” In the case of the Apple Website, they have a section dedicated to listing products that have been refurbished and are for sale at low prices. You may wonder, if these products are refurbished, don’t they break easier? Well, the truth is that these products are pretty much as good as the new ones (they undergo stringent process before they listed the products for sale) without the steep price. Not only that, all their products come with a one year warranty. You can find good deals on not only iPods, but their Powerbooks too. Click here to see the Apple discount store.