I'm the king of the world Jack [smack] What the hell?

9-year-old found with living spiders in his ear

A 9-year-old Oregon boy who complained of an earache was a little surprised when the doctor told him that a pair of spiders had tried to make a home out of him.

Jesse Courtney said it felt like the tiny spiders were "walking on my eardrums." His mother, Diane Courtney, said her son insisted he kept hearing a faint popping in his ear -- "like Rice Krispies" -- before the earache sent them to the doctor.

The doctor flushed Jesse's left ear, and the first spider came out, dead. The other spider took a second dousing before it emerged, still alive. Both were about the size of a pencil eraser. Jesse was given the spiders -- now both dead -- as a souvenir. He's already taken them to school to show his classmates. (Associated Press)

Uncensored, full-length video of (drunk) David Hasselhoff

Paris Hilton is going to jail for 45 days

Paris Hilton is not going down without a fight. The day after she was sentenced to 45 days in the slammer for violating her probation by driving with a suspended license, Hilton walked outside her house and told a gaggle of camerapeople, "I told the truth yesterday. I feel that I was treated unfairly." Hilton called the sentence "both cruel and unwarranted" and added "I don't deserve this." (TMZ)

Daddy got more than he wanted.

Dad pays $30k for son's internship at GQ

How does 30-grand sound for a choice summer job? One college student will be working at the glossy men's magazine G-Q this summer. But he be won't making 30-thousand -- that's what dad is paying for the unpaid internship. The father of a college-aged son bid more than 30-thousand dollars for the internship in a recent e-Bay online auction. The 30-grand doesn't even include housing in pricey New York or health insurance. G-Q isn't identifying the winning bidder. The online auction is part of a two (m) million dollar G-Q charity fundraiser. (ABC-Chicago)

Good intentions, bad execution.

Teen threatens to 'pull another Virginia Tech' at prom

A teen, upset over a breakup with his girlfriend, threatened to "pull another Virginia Tech" massacre at the school's prom, which was held Saturday night at Raymond James Stadium, police said.

Zephyrhills High School's prom was locked down for about 30 minutes after an anonymous caller claimed the teen was at the prom. The teen was not identified. Undercover Tampa police officers staked out the prom to make sure no violence ensued. Pasco County authorities are searching for the teen and a warrant has been issued for his arrest. (Tampa Tribune)

Ladies, seriously -- control yourselves.

(thanks terese)

How to be the 'crane game'...

400+ students pay money to change their grades

More than 70 current and former students at Diablo Valley College in Pleasant Hill are being investigated for allegedly paying bribes of up to $600 to have their grades raised on official transcripts, officials said Thursday.

College officials believe as many as 400 grades were changed, casting a cloud over the school's transcripts. About 74 students are believed to have paid student employees to change grades dating back several years, said Charles Gibson, Contra Costa Community College District police chief, at a news conference. Full article here.

Amazing tornado video, (May 4th - Ellis, Oklahoma)

[movie review] Spiderman 3

Spider-Man faces three villains in his new movie, but he's facing a lot more in the film section of your local newspaper. Critics, for the most part, have been relentless in their expressions of disappointment with Spider-Man 3. " One gets the sense of a mighty franchise in wheel-spinning mode," writes Gene Seymour in Newsday. "You'd like to think it's catching a second wind for an even mightier return. But you also wonder how much further it can go from here."

Joe Morgenstern in the Wall Street Journal expresses his let down this way: "While it's too harsh to suggest that what was fresh has gone completely stale, the truth lies in between, as with day-old bread." And Manohla Dargis in the New York Times seems just plain ticked off that the producers didn't produce better. "Aesthetically and conceptually wrung out, fizzled rather than fizzy, this latest installment in the spider-bites-boy adventure story shoots high, swings low and every so often hits the sweet spot, but mostly just plods and plods along, as if its heart were pumping tired radioactive blood," she writes.

Michael Booth in the Denver Post remarks that the movie is simply an overblown remake of the first two. "Everyone, in short, should move on. Show's over. There's nothing to see here, folks. Perhaps no two spider webs are alike, but it's getting harder and harder to tell the difference." (IMDB)

Photoworthy: the bike jump

Teen cuts pit bull's ears off with scissors? WTF?

Authorities said a 16-year-old has been arrested for cutting off a 6-month-old pit bull's ears with scissors. The teen cut off the young dog's ears, and left it on the front porch of Lavon Jackson, whose pit bull bred the litter.

Jackson took the dog to a vet, and it was later turned over to county animal control. The teen told investigators that he cut off the dog's ears because he wanted to give it a cosmetic look of cropped ears.

The veterinarian who treated the dog told investigators that the cuts would have caused extreme pain and suffering. The teen was charged Thursday with animal cruelty and taken to the Juvenile Assessment Center. (WFTV)