Tuesday, March 27, 2007

Wow, you’ve got more balls than me kid.

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[hilarious SNL skit] Peyton Manning in 'United Way'

(In my opinion, Peyton Manning really is a pretty funny dude)

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29% of Americans do not care about the Internet

A little under one-third of U.S. households have no Internet access and do not plan to get it, with most of the holdouts seeing little use for it in their lives, according to a survey released on Friday.

Park Associates, a Dallas-based technology market research firm, said 29 percent of U.S. households, or 31 million homes, do not have Internet access and do not intend to subscribe to an Internet service over the next 12 months.

The second annual National Technology Scan conducted by Park found the main reason potential customers say they do not subscribe to the Internet is because of the low value to their daily lives they perceive rather than concerns over cost.


Forty-four percent of these households say they are not interested in anything on the Internet, versus just 22 percent who say they cannot afford a computer or the cost of Internet service, the survey showed.

The answer "I'm not sure how to use the Internet" came from 17 percent of participants who do not subscribe. The response "I do all my e-commerce shopping and YouTube-watching at work" was cited by 14 percent of Internet-access refuseniks. Three percent said the Internet doesn't reach their homes. Article here.

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Congratulations Wisconsin, you’re #1!

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Dude tackled after 'exposing himself' to people leaving church

Police jailed a man Monday after he allegedly exposed himself to people leaving a local church.

Wesley Dale Vaughan, 47, was booked for indecent exposure. Vaughn, who has previous convictions for indecent exposure and feloniously pointing a firearm, will be formally charged in district court with the new offense.

Reports state Vaughan was near Abundant Life Fellowship Church when the incident occurred. Witnesses chased Vaughan to the area of Fourth and Basin, where he was tackled by one of the witnesses.

One of Vaughan’s alleged victims was an 8-year-old boy whose mother asked Vaughan what he was doing. Vaughan replied, “just hanging out.”

Cherokee County court records show Vaughan was charged twice with indecent exposure in 2002. He was charged with two counts of exposure in March 2002 and a third count in July 2002. Article here.

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[pretty funny] husband & wife discuss butt sex


Lucky Louie - Click here for this week’s top video clips
(language NSFW)

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Freakin' deer crashes through Chuck E. Cheese?

Customers at a Chuck E. Cheese restaurant got more than they bargained for when a deer crashed through the restaurant. The deer jumped through the window at the pizza restaurant at Southern Hills Mall on Sunday.

No one was hurt, said Kris Walter, a mall spokeswoman. She said a couple of guys jumped on top on the deer and held it down until officials from the Iowa Department of Natural Resources arrived.

The deer was injured but was able to be taken out of town and turned loose, Walter said. Article here.

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Pictures from the recently opened 'Grand Canyon Skywalk'

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Dad claims 2-year-old son shot him in the arm

Minneapolis police are trying to find out how a 2-year-old boy allegedly ended up with a gun and shot his father. The 24-year-old man walked into Abbott Northwestern Hospital last Saturday with a gunshot wound to his arm. The man told police that his 2-year-old son had taken the gun from his mother's purse and fired it at him.

"I cannot think of the last time a 2-year-old was involved in a shooting," Lt. Amelia Huffman, a police spokeswoman, said Tuesday. "It's a pretty rare thing, thankfully."

Huffman said the 22-year-old mother was home but not in the room at the time. A 4-year-old child also was in the house, but there was no other witness to the shooting. Police were investigating whether there was any child endangerment, since the 2-year-old apparently was able to reach a gun. No was arrested or charged. Article here.

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A letter 'from the heart', Starbucks Employee:

To all of you silly, sad caffeine addicts who line up like lemmings for your overpriced lattes every morning: there are some things you should know.
1. We are not your friends. We are usually not your neighbors. In most cases, we absolutely loathe you, but we are outwardly friendly -- because we are paid to do so. You are not getting special treatment, and we really don’t give a shit about your last vacation or your new baby or your real estate problems. We ask how you’re doing because it’s a way of making conversation, and we are pressured to make conversation in this line of work. Now, there are some customers who are genuinely liked, but they’re few and far between. If you have to think about it, you’re probably not one of them.

2. Oh, you work from home? We are not your water-cooler break. We may be the only humans you have interacted with for days, but do not expect us to be interested in your stupid home business or your racist, sexist, totally unfunny commentary. Get your drink and get out.

3. Enough with repeating the George Carlin Starbucks order joke! It was funny the first time we heard it. Maybe. You are probably the four hundredth person to say it to me, expecting me to laugh, and I guarantee that you’re going to be disappointed.


If you want to keep reading #4-#15, click here >>.

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Today Show, Meredith 'bites it' on ice skates (Will Ferrell)

(jump to 0:41, it looks like it hurt, ice isn't soft)

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Carlos Mencia steals jokes from Bill Cosby? WTF?

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Dude wakes up to find Jeep on top of him in bed

Dean Blevins had a Jeep crash on top of him at 2:30 in the morning, while he was in bed. A Jeep crashed through a wall of Blevins' apartment early Tuesday and pinned him in his bed. It took firefighters an hour to free him, but he suffered only minor bruises and scrapes.

As he saw the vehicle's engine above him and felt hot antifreeze splash onto his face, Blevins said, his initial thoughts were less about his injuries than about going after the driver.

"If I'd a had my gun," he told The Roanoke Times, "I'd a probably shot him."
The driver, Wesley Dewayne Smith, 34, of Roanoke, was charged with driving under the influence.

Building owner Wesley Dearing said the Jeep's windshield got snagged between the first and second floors of the wood-frame building, probably saving Blevins from being crushed.

Blevins, 58, was treated at a hospital and released. His apartment was condemned until repairs could be made, but he said he had calmed down enough to laugh about the experience. "I'm lucky to be alive," he said. Article here.

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