Dude drinks gasoline, hit lit a cigarette -- starts fire.

A German man is being treated for serious burns Monday after accidentally setting his apartment ablaze when he mixed up a bottle of gasoline with alcohol, police said.

The 56-year-old apparently grabbed the wrong bottle and took a swig from the gasoline flask, then spat it out when he realized his mistake. The gas hit a lit cigarette, sparking the fire, police said. » Article here

Teacher puts clothespins on students to keep them quiet

A substitute teacher's tool for silencing chatty kindergartners -- clothespins -- doesn't wash with school officials.

Four boys said spring-type clothespins were placed over their upper or lower lips for talking too much in class, Amanda-Clearcreek Primary School principal Mike Johnsen wrote in a letter to parents this week.

Ruth Ann Stoneburner, a retired school nurse who had worked as a substitute for several years, confirmed to Johnsen that she had used the clothespin discipline March 26, he said.

Stoneburner will not work again in the Amanda-Clearcreek district and was being reported to the state education department, Superintendent J.B. Dick said Wednesday. Article here.

Keith Richards snorted his father's ashes mixed with cocaine

Rolling Stones guitarist Keith Richards said in an interview published on Tuesday that he once snorted his father's ashes mixed with cocaine.

Richards, 63, whose fondness for drugs has been openly acknowledged for decades, was quoted by music magazine NME as saying his unusual experiment with paternally enhanced cocaine came after his father's death five years ago. "The strangest thing I've tried to snort? My father. I snorted my father. He was cremated, and I couldn't resist grinding him up with a little bit of blow," Richards said in the interview, which was posted on NME's Web site.

"My dad wouldn't have cared," Richards said, adding, "It went down pretty well, and I'm still alive." An NME spokeswoman told Reuters the story was genuine and not a late April Fool's joke. She said the interview would appear on newsstands across the nation starting on Wednesday. Article here.

Dude charged after 'biting wife' for refusing to cook for him

A man has been charged with biting his wife after she refused to wake up to cook dinner and hit him in the head with an unknown object.

Christopher Hughey was charged with battery after his wife told police he attacked her. According to police, Hughey told officers he tried to wake his wife by gently rubbing her stomach. Hughey said he did that so she would get up to cook dinner.

The woman told police that she remained asleep and that Hughey became hostile. The report said Hughey was playing with their children some time later when his wife hit him in the head with an unknown object.

Hughey told police he then bit her on the shoulder, leaving a red bite mark. Hughey was taken to the Brevard County Jail and later released. Article here.

Eddie Griifin wrecks a $1 million dollar Ferrari Enzo!

Eddie Griffin, comedian, destroyed a rare million-dollar Enzo Ferrari on Monday when he crashed it into a barricade while promoting a movie. He was unhurt in the low-speed incident, at Irwindale Speedway, about 20 miles east of Los Angeles. "The brother's good at karate and all the rest of that, but the brother can't drive," Griffin told reporters. He was practicing for a celebrity charity racing event tied to his upcoming film, "Redline."

The car, one of just 400 manufactured, belonged to the film's producer, Daniel Sadek. Sadek estimated that the car was worth $1.2 million, and seemed philosophical about the loss, saying he was just happy that Griffin was unharmed. The real-estate investor has put up his own money for the $26 million picture, and allowed one of his two $200,000 Porsche Carreras to be destroyed for a scene in it. Article here.

Drunk dude crashes, claims 'a unicorn was driving'

The unicorn was driving. That was the story a Billings man gave police after crashing a pickup truck into a light pole.

Phillip Carston Holliday Jr., 42, was arraigned in District Court on felony charges of criminal endangerment and drunken driving. Judge Gregory Todd maintained Holliday's bond at $100,000 after being advised that the man's criminal history includes five prior DUI convictions, four felonies, 35 misdemeanors and 53 traffic violations, including 28 convictions for driving with a suspended license.

Holliday was arrested after a one-vehicle accident. Two police officers witnessed the crash, which occurred when a truck drove through a red light and nearly struck another truck in the intersection. According to court records, the driver then made an erratic U-turn through a gas station, crossed the street and crashed into a light pole. The two police officers who were nearby said the driver got out of the truck and fell down. The man got up and tried to run away, but fell again after about 30 feet. He was then arrested.

At Holliday's arraignment Tuesday, Deputy County Attorney Ingrid Rosenquist said Holliday initially denied driving the truck involved in the accident. He told officers a unicorn was driving, Rosenquist said. Article here.